Disparate

These thoughts I hold and keep inside

What truth have I been told

To understand and know for sure

What intellect this mind might hold

Intentions wrought with depravity

Motives muted and malignant

I fall onto my ankles

Hear the melodious dissonance

I let it out in bursts

That no one shall ever see

And realise there’s this conflict

That broils within me

I leap inside my memory

To find those days of old

Where all I could remember

Was the goodness unforetold

Then I realise those reminisces

Were not that great afterall

But the pain that cut so deep

Still makes me walk into the wall

Save me Lord I cry

Release me from this capture

Set me free to be Yours alone

Destroy my elusive treasure

Save me Lord I cry

I am descending the spiral stairs

And into the depths of my soul

I have given up my cares

Save me Lord I cry

This pain is far too deep

This struggle to find peace

And a ceasing when I weep

Save me Lord I cry

When I pray these tears would cease

I find a scorching desert

Freedom of no release

So I walk in every direction

And I run to every mirage

But only to find disappointment

Every puzzle piece of my collage

Save me Lord I cry

My words are too disparate

My heart’s yeaning may fail

Make me desperate

-Ella