The first time I spent New Year’s Eve alone

Ever since I was a young, I have always spent the NYE countdown at a friend’s place with a bunch of people I am really familiar with.

NYE was always so filled with chatter and I would always play card or board games with friends. I can’t remember any NYE without a countdown and without people i love around me.

It was only until yesterday that I spent NYE alone. I was away from my family and friends and in a two-storey house in a foreign land. i slept before I could even countdown to the new year ahead.

And then it hit me, counting down really isn’t that important. Having been alone with no human to talk to for the past few days has made me enjoy the solitude I have always yearned for. There’s a beauty about spending time alone to reflect on things, to liberate oneself and just sing out loud and prance around the house.

Many people make resolutions at the strike of 12 of the new year, and most admit to discarding the ambitious resolutions three days later.

However, I remember my young fourteen-year-old self sticking to about 5 resolutions in that year. And it really did me good.

I have a few simple things I want to adhere to not just this new year as I embrace my adulthood (finally), but also for the years to come:

1) To love people more.
I realise I love myself so much more than I love others. I give myself the best and always want to claim personal space and time, but I know I should spend more time helping others, listening to their problems and just being there for them. I admit I am sometimes half-hearted about listening to others’ problems so this year, I want to be more genuine. And this comes from purely loving others more.

2) Not to put so much stress on just doing well and therefore casting aside other things.
I know it’s so important to do well in university. It determines my pay, my job prospects etc. But, as long as I try my best, I am going to leave the rest to God. If he will that I do badly and change my career track, then so be it. it’s so hard to truly believe in that, but I have seen some improvement in my attitude towards this so I hope to continue to improve.

3) To be more dedicated
To making music ❤ To play music from my heart. To be true to myself when choosing my repertoire and to want to genuinely speak to the audience when I’m on the piano.

I read Romans 2 on New Year’s Day this year and I hope the message will be etched clearly in my head for the rest of the year. Romans 2 shall be the passage of the year.

<3, Isabel


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