Pursuit

Many a time do I desire

To let it fall from my hands

Just leave whatever I pursue

Kill the sad pretense

The world is drunk on all its pleasures

My rude awakening

A half sober possibility

Its pleasures I’m still pursuing

It’ll ruin me and harden my heart

Block out all the light

I yearn for what this world can give

Please don’t let me lose this fight

What am I fighting for I ask

I want to let it go

And drop everything just to rest

Still fearing I’ll have nothing to show

This mad dance of emotions

This overwhelming burden of proof

Holding it altogether

And seeming so aloof

Don’t wait till you fall down

Don’t wait till you burn out

And broken will you be

Filled with hurt and doubt

I need to realise now

How broken I already am

To focus on what matters

Treat treasures of the world with contempt

He is no fool to lose

What he cannot keep

Just so he can gain

The status as His sheep

The fear of losing loved ones

The fear of not being good enough

The fear of no security

The fear of life being tough

Just goes to show my heart

Is still far from the treasure

That I know for a fact

Would give me the greatest pleasure

Ella

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